Lakers v Bucks 12.21.2010

Denver misses Brandon Jennings:

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I don't believe in God. Not even a Spinozan logical God as the first cause of all causes. But I still pray that Lamar Odom becomes an All-Star. I forgive you for the '08 finals. I realize that you and Luke were the only ones who had Kobe's back in the pre-Gasol medieval times. 

Whatever team you play on is ridiculously better with you ont he floor. You will never be appreciated so I'm renouncing my membership with the Brights and asking 'Hov to get you int he All-Star game. 

And I swear that I wrote all of this before seeing that back-to-the-basket-behind-the-back-beauty to art model Artest. 

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Imagine if Kobe suddenly aged 15 years and had to play against the Bucks' 2s today. He'd still drop 30 on 46% and hit the game winner. Simply gorgeous. Kobe used every inch of his frame and moved his body in space in exactly the right way to create enough leverage and/or balance to loft a shot into the rim. The mechanics of his movement could even put '98 Airness to shame. 

How can dominance be so quiet?

On an unrelated note, I fully expect to see Bogut on Twitter again complaining about Kobe's travel + three point play. It only seems to happen against Bogut. 

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In my last post, I dicussed the stellar adj. +/- of Ilyasova and how if the Bucks knew what was good for them and listened to Denver, they would give Ersan some more burn. Well, Scott Skiles found my post while doing an unrelated search for pornography involving girls in Denver drinking Foster's beer and today the Lakers paid. 

His focused mug works way better than Bogut's oh-my-god-i'm-seeing-double-what-happened-last-night-at-Outback face. 

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'Drew on the bench is actually an optimal configuration but theoretically it won't be radically different in terms of the Maverick's flexibility in choosing lineups. We saw this LO-Bynum-Kobe lineup early in '010 and its pleasing in short spurts, especially if say Pau Gasol was being bullied by Aussie and Turkish big men. 

Matt Barnes had a rare off-night too. I was begging for more Luke/Artest. Perhaps it was the trauma of being called on Twitter by someone with the word "deepthroat" in her Twitter handle. 

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Is it okay to bring up that bullshit about the Lakers being soft? Or do the printing presses of Los Angeles still run on hyperbole?

Whatever, we just got Boykinsed. 

Lakers v Bucks 11/16/2010 (9-2)

Non-linear depictions of Denver Tyrone Foster's mental representations upon remembrance of this Lakers game past on NBA League Pass Broadband.

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Kobe can't really finish with contact any more. The ability to take a hit, convert and truly dash the other team's belief in its ability to stop you is a necessary condition of being an elite MVP caliber player. It is by no means a sufficient condition. I'd rather have Corey Maggette than Kobe go up with the ball from 8 ft. on in but it'll be a warm day in Sarah Palin's heart before I take Maggette over Kobe in anything else.

Mark my words, Kobe is my favorite currently playing sociopath and one of my favorite people of all time, but it's time we, like the Bulls evaluating post-baseball Jordan be honest with our hero's capabilities and limitations.

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The first quarter was a salvo. The Lakers endured even as the shells became lodged in their sneakers.

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The Z-Bo theorem (show a much maligned offensive/defensive black hole enough love and he rewards his employers with heretofore unseen and dram-free productivity) applies to the ragtag band of misfits and perennial keep-a-suitcase-ready trade bait. Drew Gooden posted the highest true shooting percentage of the night for the Deers and was seen on multiple occasions by this humble author diving for loose balls. This is very unbecoming behavior of a mercenary. One can imagine Maggette laughing at these displays of espirit de corps, mocking Gooden for risking injury and lowering his value on the open market.

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Devin Ebanks has no fucking clue what he's doing. Blocked, cherry picks, frustration dunks, fouled, somehow stays focused enough to make free throw. Pulled soon after.

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Ilyasova should be starting. Oh how quickly the Bucks doth forget whose rebounding and all around plus-minus goodness let them snatch win that playoff game in Atlanta last year. This man is the Buck's future and their present. Fear the right deer dammit. 

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The most fascinating thing about the Lakers offense are the bailout plays. Kobe triple pumps and drains. Gasol fades and swishes. Fisher has been an excellent pressure release thus far, slinging threes from behind his head to erase the mistakes of the shot-clock parched skip pass.

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"I can't look at Artest without thinking of..." pre-2k10 this sentence would be finished with the malice at the palace, post 2k10 it's thankfully finished with "his post-game soliloquy after the finals last year."

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Wonder if Scott Skiles is going to spend all of next practice punishing his players for giving the Lakers' free and-1s on fastbreaks. The Bucks defenders stamped the fast-breaker's boarding pass/hand, waved them through to the hoop and bid them farewell on the merry way to the free throw line.

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Can't really see or hear squad six. Why isn't there a camera crew constantly focused on their antics?

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Finally, this team is, thus far, so '08-'09  in style, depth and fire-smooth offensive execution. It flirted with a brand new '011 mold in the early going, efficient-low volume Kobe, franchise player Pau and quietly effective bench. Now they're regressing back to '09: Kobe-reliant, a bit Pau-ignorant. Fortunately, we do get the fantastic bench of the '08 regular season with Sasha's effectiveness split between and multiplied by the killer Bs. 

This Lakers team, in its long-molten core, carries an endless number of previous selves within its soul.